I always say my mother gave me a great gift. She taught me professionalism even when you're writing a  "go to hell" letter. You want to get your point across so that the person on the other side looks forward to the journey.

What I don't understand is...where has that gone?

My son's English teacher is teaching them to write professional emails. In fact, it is the only way she will respond to you. I'm proud to say, he has the professionalism down, and that makes me very happy because I see this as a lost art.

I wish I could tell you how many emails and messages I get a month, as a publisher or an author, where the author of the email has no concern over the content of the email. Misspelled words. Missing punctuation. Horrible grammar. And I'm here to tell you that "text" talk isn't professional at all. 

What happened to the days of Dear Mrs. Smith, or To Whom it May Concern? Anymore, emails or messages start off with Hey! 


Don't get me wrong. If I'm emailing my BFF about having a decaf, non-fat, mocha, well then yes, I might start out the conversation with, Hey! However, if I'm inquiring about a job, or an opportunity you can GUARANTEE I'm going to do some research on whom I'm writing the email to and I'm going to address them correctly.

I have, in fact, tossed out submissions for my publishing house when I feel that the professionalism from the author isn't there. An email in all caps will not be read and if you start a query out with Hey there is a huge chance it won't be read either.

There is a wealth of information out there on writing professional emails, letters, queries, etc. With the world at your fingertips, why wouldn't you try a little harder to impress? 

With that said, join me here tomorrow when I go over the fundamentals of a professional email. (Feel free to share it with anyone who could benefit.)

The Walker Family Series is the newest in my family sagas. Book 1, WALKER PRIDE, is available  now!
Get your copy here: 

Susan Hayes moved to Georgia to start the life she wanted to live and build her catering career. On the brink of having everything she ever wanted, Eric Walker and his family happened into her life.

Eric Walker’s life had been quiet, structured, and boring until his uncle gambled away the family’s property and jeopardized Eric’s livelihood. Now midst family secrets learned, someone ruining his business and trying to drive him off his land, he fell in love. 

Things will never be the same for them—especially if someone succeeds in destroying the Walker family and killing Eric.

How to stay motivated to write.

If you'd begun writing you'll soon realize that your mind will wander in a million directions. If you haven't given yourself permission to write you're going to be thinking of the dishes in the sink and the clothes in the washer.  Make sure your writing time is important to you and that will help motivate you.

Another key factor in writing is reading. Yep! You need to read to write. Now, I say this from experience. While writing my first book when I was much, much younger, I stopped reading. My purpose was because I didn't want to accidentally steal anything. But the truth is reading other writers only encouraged my creativity. Think about it...when you were younger and you danced until your heart was content you'd follow along at some point, right. It didn't make your dance any less yours. There are only so many story lines and so many words. It's how you string them together.

Think about how music moves you to work out, or dance, or sing at the top of your lungs. That creative spark sparks another. Reading is much the same.

A less popular method of keeping motivated (this is usually by newer writers) is share your work. Find someone who is so enthusiastic about reading what you've wrote and share it with them. Their enthusiasm will spark yours. I'm not talking a critique partner either. I'm talking someone who just loves what you do. It might take some guts to find that person, but I tell you it's worth it.

Again, journal everyday. I'm not saying you need to even journal your trip to the store. However, there is something in everyday. Look up writing prompts on Google. There are tons of them and they will spark your creativity a little bit. We can all use that.

Create a blog. Everyone is an expert in something. Yes, even you can write a blog about something. Heck, Sienfield had an entire show about nothing--and that was the tag line! Create a blog calendar and search how to create blog content. It may not be a book, but it is keeping you writing.

The best way to keep motivated is to have a goal. Do you want to publish in magazines or write books? Are you going to submit to a big house, small house, or self-publish? If you're working with publishing houses you're going to be under contract to do certain things with your writing. A contract certainly motivates you!

Motivating yourself to write will NEVER come easily. After 22 books published I still have to convince myself that I have to sit and write and not just mess around with it. Those dishes aren't going anywhere. They'll be there when I'm done. Writing is important to me. Luckily it pays my bills. So that is one motivating factor. The other is that I crave it and love it. Be true to yourself. That might be all the motivation you need.

Author Bernadette Marie is known for building families readers want to be part of. Her series The Keller Family has graced bestseller charts since its release in 2011, along with her other series and single title books. The married mother of five sons promises Happily Ever After always…and says she can write it, because she lives it. 

When not writing, Bernadette Marie is shuffling her sons to their many events—mostly hockey—and enjoying the beautiful views of the Colorado Rocky Mountains from her front step. She is also an accomplished martial artist with a second degree black belt in Tang Soo Do.

A chronic entrepreneur, Bernadette Marie opened her own publishing house in 2011, 5 Prince Publishing, so that she could publish the books she liked to write and help make the dreams of other aspiring authors come true too.

If you're in the industry you hear it all the time. "I've always wanted to write a book." With a smile on my face I usually tell the person that all you have to do is start. Of course the very unserious "writer" will give me a list of their excuses as to why they can't. A writer who will consider it says, "How do I start." To me that is the key phrase that says, I'm ready.

You have to be motivated to write. Simply put, it takes time out of your day just as it does to go to the gym. Now you can't just sit down and usually write an entire book in one day. You have to start a little at a time. The key is to start.

Motivate your writing by sitting down with a notebook and writing whatever comes to mind. Perhaps you don't want to write a book, you want to write a blog. Google blog topics and you'll be amazed at what comes up. If nothing else you'll have some writing queues to get you started. Let your brain flow for a little bit.

Set out a few minutes in your day, every day to write. You don't need eight hours a day unless you intend on this being your whole career and you can financially afford that now. Ten minutes will be a great start. As your craft grows so will your motivation to continue writing regularly.

Once you start the process of writing with the intent to publish or just to get started it will be like going to the gym. One day you lift  five pounds. After a few weeks you lift twenty. Like I said, you're not going to become a writer in one day, okay you will, perhaps just not a published one. But on day one you wrote something. What usually happens is his motivates you to write something else the next day.

If the desire is really in you it will begin to self motivate you.

If you've loved writing in the past and lost sight of it this process can help you get back on track again. Continuing to carve out a little time each day will help to keep you motivated.

Journal writing is equally as motivating for the creative process. Seriously, jotting down what you did, saw, felt in a day will keep that daily task minder in the back of your head. Every little bit counts. Just like running. Every step gets you to your goal.

 Author Bernadette Marie is known for building families readers want to be part of. Her series The Keller Family has graced bestseller charts since its release in 2011, along with her other series and single title books. The married mother of five sons promises Happily Ever After always…and says she can write it, because she lives it. 

When not writing, Bernadette Marie is shuffling her sons to their many events—mostly hockey—and enjoying the beautiful views of the Colorado Rocky Mountains from her front step. She is also an accomplished martial artist with a second degree black belt in Tang Soo Do.

A chronic entrepreneur, Bernadette Marie opened her own publishing house in 2011, 5 Prince Publishing, so that she could publish the books she liked to write and help make the dreams of other aspiring authors come true too.

And we will rebuild...

It is 2015 and today is September 11th. For so many of us this is one of those days where we all say, "Where were you when?" Where were you when we fell under attack? Where were you when innocent lives were taken? Where were you when selfless first respondents lost their lives? Where where you when your sense of security and your daily life as you know it changed forever? I was getting my 1 year-old son ready for his first morning away from me in a Church-pre-K school. I had to let go of one of the people I loved most and let someone watch him for all of two hours so he'd learn what it was about to grow up and go to school. I had to feel insecure with the world around me changing so rapidly I couldn't see straight. And yet, for the sake of my two little babies...I needed to stay calm.  Every year I dedicate my blog to the remembrance of what happened that day. I wore the name of a man, Joseph Mistrulli, on my arm for years, until the bracelet gave way. I didn't know him, but I took it upon myself to learn about him and remember him. In 2012 his daughter joined me on my blog, bringing two different world together as we are all brothers and sisters. She shared with me a poem she'd written for her father in it appears below. In 2014 my husband and my eldest son (who was 3 at the time of the attacks) visited Ground Zero. I tear up just thinking of my husband's reaction when he was there. He's a big strong man who had to sit on a bench and cry because it was so emotional. And...in reality...our lives changed that day forever, but we were so far away from it as well. Today I am reposting my blog post from 2012. I ask that you take a moment to think of all those who died that day and all of those who have fought for us to stay free and safe. Hug everyone you know. Bring peace into your own life and walk through life with a purpose. You never know when you'll be called upon.


IN REMEMBRANCE 2012 (reposted)

There is never a day that has passed since September 11, 2001 that I don't appreciate the mountains outside my window, the blue sky over my head, and even the sound of air traffic. Today, just miles from my home, at the Red Rocks Amphitheater thousands will walk the stairs, many in full firefighter gear carrying tanks and hoses, to commemorate the day that so many people were lost. For years I have wanted to walk beside them, and still, I make it my goal that someday I will walk that walk.

Last year I was alone on 9/11. I walked in a local parade with my karate family. A sense of community wellness and love was deep in my heart that day.  On the tenth anniversary, I came home to an empty house, void of the six men that I protect and likewise protect me. And I, like I'm sure so many others, was sucked into the television documentaries of the day that had passed.

Living in Colorado, let me tell you how it was here. It was quiet.. Eerily quiet. No sounds of air traffic. No kids playing in the streets. No traffic. The world had stopped.  Seeing the footage of New York City, Washington DC, and Pennsylvania, I know that they had no silence.

The media sheltered the world from so much of the devastation. We did not see those trapped and hanging from the windows screaming for help. We didn't see shopkeepers hiding behind their counters avoiding debris. We didn't realize people who lived across the streets lost their homes. It was about the towers.

Last year I think faces were added to our minds.  Last screams. Last phone calls. Last images.

Even now as I think about it tears fill my eyes. Strangers carried each other down flights of stairs as they passed firefighters walking up the stairs. And the devastation of how many families waited and waited for word.

I met a woman at a conference from Nova Scotia who worked at the airport that day. Her stories of the mass amount of planes that had to land there was amazing. With US air closed, this was the only choice.  Airplanes filled the hangers, runways, and highways.  She told us of two young girls who had come from England and were headed to Boston. Their trusting parents put them on a flight, and their grandparents would be at the end of that flight in Boston, but the plane landed in Nova Scotia.  I can't imagine the frantic family there, who wasn't in a tower, who didn't lose a loved one, but because of such a horrible act of terrorism their little girls were lost with strangers.

What did we learn that day? We learned that we are all neighbors. Thousands of miles away, Coloradans filled blood banks to donate blood. The first plane to fly after the attacks was a private jet from Colorado carrying blood to New York.  We opened our wallets, our homes, and our hearts.  Strangers became brothers and sisters.  We banded together as Americans--as people.

I think of how much it hurts to think about today, from me, a television bystander untouched by the events directly. Sure, I can't meet my husband at the gate of an airplane. I have to take off my shoes to go through airport security. I can't knit on the plane. But I am alive. I am well. I didn't lose anyone I knew and loved with all my heart. If I ache this much...I think of those families.

Every year I honor a man I never met with my posts.  It started with my sister-in-law asking my husband to get her a bracelet with Jason Dahl's name on it.  He was the captain of United Airlines flight 93 which crashed in Pennsylvania, and a fellow Coloradan. He asked if I wanted one and I said no. It felt petty. No good would come if I made a monetary purchase to a company to took a name from a list of those who were lost in such horror. But he bought me one.  I wore it for years.  My son wore it until the metal gave way.  But I didn't let that gift signify just something I wore.  I learned about the man.

Every year I pay tribute to Joseph Mistrulli who died when the first tower was hit. He was carpenter working to finish a job, who was to have left the building that morning at eight, a father to three, and a loving husband. His family was gracious over the years to post letters and pictures online so those of us could remember him.  This week I was honored to have his daughter contact me and thank me for keeping his memory alive. Who knew that the events of that day, which live with each and every one of us, would still bring people together.  She has offered to share her story here on my blog and commemorate her father.  I'm beyond honored! 

Some of my children were very young when this happened.  Some weren't born. I look at my own life and the tragedies that have happened and the wars that were fought. I know so little about them. Born during the Vietnam War I know nothing about it. World War II, I know a little, but think of the lack of humanity that we know so little about.

9/11 may someday be something that is only called Patriot Day on our calendars, but I hope its not. I hope we continue to educate our youth on that day and to remember it. It was a horrible day. It was a terrorist attack on U.S. soil. And it taught us all that there is still humanity in our society in light of a few who devastated so many lives that day.

Please go hug your kids today, your spouse, your loved ones. Tell a stranger hi. Smile at someone who looks a bit overwhelmed. Give back to the community you live in even if you only pick up a piece of trash.  Be there for each other and don't forget... no matter your skin color, your religious or political beliefs, or your sex... we are brothers and sisters in this life.  Take care of each other.

Music is my muse; Silence is my style

Growing up I was lucky enough to have both my grandmothers in my life. Both women were always home, but that is where ALL similarities ended. One thing I think about when I think about my grandmothers is that my mother's mother would spend her entire day alone in her house in silence. (And still does) There is never a radio on and the TV doesn't come on until Jeopardy.  My father's mother, on the other hand, never ever turned her TV off! It ran almost 24/7.

I laugh when my mother says she has the TV on for noise. I get that. When I'm folding laundry I turn on NCIS for the noise. But when I work...there is silence.

People ask me all the time how I can work with 5 sons running a muck. Somewhere I have learned to tune out the chaos and get my writing done. But when they are at school, and I have the house to myself...there is silence.

I don't listen to a radio, iTunes, Pandora...you name it. There is no TV on for noise. I can sit at my computer for six straight hours and not have another sound, but the sounds I make. (I do admit to having conversations. What good writer doesn't?)

Now, that's not to say music isn't important. When I run I notice that if a certain song comes on I run faster or I slow down. Very powerful. And in the car...I can't stand to have it quiet (most the time.) Music feeds me. I've written more than one book off of no more than ten words in a song. I don't write the book off of the meaning of the song, but the words spark something. Yes, I wrote a whole book off of a line that talked about tapping the brakes to show the tail lights!

So, music is very important in my life. I live it, I breathe it, I enjoy it. But when it comes to working...silence is my style.

What's your style?

You are a new author. You wrote a book and you were lucky enough to have it published or you published it yourself. CONGRATULATIONS!!!  You have done an amazing thing and it's only going to get better from here! But first you're going to sweat it out. You're going to cry, scream, and get mad as hell. Then you're going to have to go back and keep working. Why? Because if you haven't been on reality TV making a fool of yourself, you haven't won an Oscar, and you haven't been naked on the pages of some magazine...no one knows who you are!

Now don't let that discourage you. But think about it. Who knows you're going to put a book out? Your parents, siblings, aunts, uncles...you get my drift. And when they all buy your book you've sold maybe 10 copies that day. And this is a sad fact.

I'm not going to say that it happens to all of us. But yeah, for the most part this is how the day goes. You've made it to be something bigger in your head, but let me tell you in the nearly 4 years of publishing new authors I have only seen a couple books go bestseller on release day from unknown authors. (And all but one were in obscure categories.)

On my last release day I found it most interesting that new authors were coming to me to ask about my success. 7 of the last Keller Family series books have gone bestseller before they were released. I'll tell you, that never gets old!!!  But when I was a new author (mind you I had one of those publishers everyone warns you about...and she did nothing but put the book up on her website then tell me she was surprised I didn't sell any...sigh...I digress) no one knew me either. It took me busting my butt everyday to get the word out there just the slightest bit. And it took me writing and writing and writing more books. People want to say, "Oh, cool, she has another book!" The Merger was my 21st published book in 3 1/2 years. That's right, I didn't stop with just one book and hope it was going to do all the work. I kept working.

I did everything I could to splash social media...in a personal way. I made friends. I connected with readers. I was personable and I think that alone wins over some votes. With the indie movement at such a height readers are finding now that there are some talented authors out there and they can connect with them. Authors who hide behind their craft and don't come out for air...I feel they are selling themselves short. Just to chat on your Facebook page once a day isn't a big deal...but it is to a reader.

The small publishing house I own is a work in progress. Every author teaches us something--some good--some bad. But we learn. Our marketing department is forever in process. The marketing director is fueled by finding the right fit for all authors. But the hard and horrible fact remains. If the world doesn't know you're coming nothing is going to sell.

Okay, this post is depressing! But the underlying fact is you have to keep working. Fine, book one is out there. People are going to find it. Get book two and three and four out there. Do it in a timely manner and do it well. In the not to far future someone who read one will read two and then three. They will tell their friends and so on. Book four might just launch on the bestseller list and isn't that what we all want? But remember, book one...that one is for you. Still enjoy the moment, just remember that you still have some work ahead of you, but dang it you did good!!!  You wrote a book! You got it published!!!  There are still people out there saying "I'd like to write a book someday." Hold your head high and thank mom for buying your book! Now...get to work. One book needs another and you ARE bestseller material!

Muffin Tops are In!

You’re thinking…really? I know, as a child of the 80’s, I had a smokin’ body with thanks from plenty of aerobics and sit-ups, well hidden under my two layered shirt, skirt with leggings, and three pairs of socks.  Fashion- maybe.  Lack of self confidence?  More than likely.

Now I look around at these girls, and they’re wearing minimal fabric on their bodies, and I’m not sure they know what a sit-up is.  That muffin top roll is prominently displayed for the world to see.  But what else do I notice about these girls with muffin tops of all sizes? I notice them walking with their chins up, and shoulders back as if they could care less that my mouth is wide open and I’m shocked at their appearance?  They have confidence, oodles of it, and what a beautiful thing.

I think growing up, and growing older, self-confidence is something that has been hard for me to grasp hold of.  I can’t even begin to tell you anything I was confident about before I was twelve.  In junior high I was a good student.  Straight A’s with that one pesky B blocking my perfect GPA.  (But just for the record it was an 88%)  In high school, I was a good vocalist.  In fact, my professional voice coach told me I had a voice of a classily trained opera singer.  It usually took 20 years to accomplish that kind of voice and I was 10 years ahead of most people.  What I didn’t have was the confidence to carry though.

I never aced an audition, because I didn’t have the confidence to do it my way.  I’d take the easy route.  I didn’t have the confidence to try things in college or get more involved, because I just might fail if I got that far.

I never submitted my manuscript because someone might just turn it down.

KaBoom!  Hit with the grenade of truth! 

If you don’t have confidence in yourself, well you’re hiding your muffin top.  How can you be a successful writer if you won’t let someone read your work?  Guess what. I got shot down, over and over and over again.  It hurt.  When someone tells you, “This is so bad I wouldn’t even consider it if came across my desk,” you tend to shed a few tears.  Or, “If I buy you a box of commas will you use them?” (This is classic.  This was a contest and those two comments paired with someone who gave me no comments and a very high score. Helpful, huh?) This tends to make you hide your muffin top under layers and layers of rewrites. 

Then one day you decide you’re worthy of the tighter shirt.  You have nothing to hide.  You attend a local RWA meeting.  You get a critique partner, actually two and one happens to be a retired language arts teacher.  You learn that you use and a awful lot.  You begin to understand that you shift POV much too often.  When a critique partner says, “This isn’t making sense to me,” you realize that you haven’t looked at that story.  You hid it, because you didn’t want to show it to the world yet.  You have to revise.

Once you expose that muffin top, you don’t care who is looking.  You push your shoulders back and walk with your chin high.  Then you begin to feel the power.  That first person asks for a partial manuscript, which leads to a full.  You have Beta readers who come back and ask for more.  The book becomes reality and people come to you crying because what you wrote moved them so deeply and changed their lives.  You become someone asked to attend signings, be on committees, and the glorious part – you’re asked to write more books.

Suddenly you realize you’re showing off your muffin top in a bikini!  You’re totally exposed!  But your head is high, shoulders pushed back, and you’re feeling that self confidence like you never have before.

So I wonder, who will those girls who bare their muffin tops become?  Will they take over the world someday in their tight shirts?  Perhaps.  Until then, I’ll hide my literal muffin top under a peasant shirt, but keep my chin high, shoulders back, and I’ll keep writing because that’s what I love to do!

Happy Reading!

Bernadette Marie


POST ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE WARRIOR PRINCESS ROMANCE WRITER BLOG ON 7/31/11

Perhaps it's not the biggest thing I've ever done, but it's time to move my blog HERE! Yes, I will be reposting my work here where it belongs, on my homepage. Content might not be new for some time, but it will give my older blog topics some new life as well.  I hope you will enjoy the fresh new setting here! If you're curious about my former blog and what's there, check it out. www.authorbernadettemarie.blogspot.com

Thanks everyone!
Happy Reading!
Bernadette Marie